On Scrooge and the Grinch

Every year, it seems that I hear someone saying they can't wait until the holidays are over.  It starts at Thanksgiving with someone slaving for days to prepare the perfect feast for dozens of relatives.  It ends with a paucity of thank yous and un-met expectations of gratitude for the food, the decorations, the hospitality. . . and the list goes on.

Then, we dive into Back Friday sales keeping our kids out 'til midnight so we can buy them twice as many presents if we get them all for 1/2 price.  We hide the gifts, bribe the kids into good behavior with the promise of dreams coming true on Christmas morning.  Then, we rush through the towers of gifts hardly having time to acknowledge one before moving on to the next. . . places to go, people to see and more gifts to unwrap.

Six weeks of greed can be exhausting.  Agreed?  It's enough to turn the most ambitious among us into Scrooges and Grinches.

By New Year's we're laden with guilt after our binge and ready to make restitution with diets and budget cuts and promises that next year will be different.

I can't help but think, "Maybe we're doing it wrong."

The other night we were scheduled to go to a nursing home and sing Christmas carols.  On the way there, Mrs O and I had a disagreement. . . actually, it was just a 'heated agreement!'  We both agreed that I was being a jerk.  There wasn't any disagreement about it!  Things were feeling pretty ugly going into that nursing home and I had all I could do to begin singing.

Then I started singing.

I saw the elderly folk smiling as we performed our amateurish caroling.  I spoke with a World War II veteran who was delighted to have someone who would listen to his stories.  I also met one lady with a strange looking eye.  I don't know if it was glass or if she had cataracts, but it induced a sense of hesitation to say the least.  At the end of the caroling, my two boys ran up to her and wrapped their arms around her.  They wished her a Merry Christmas.

She said, "That was the best Christmas gift ever!"

I left the nursing home that night feeling quite differently than I had upon arriving.  It's not really that surprising when I think about it.  Changing the focus of my actions changed the focus of my thinking.

We can do the same thing with our Christmas traditions.  If you are having trouble with the hustle and bustle of the holidays, try changing the focus of your actions.  If your family is less than grateful for your efforts, put that effort toward an outwardly focused cause.

Invite your ungrateful family members to join you in serving the homeless on Christmas Eve.

Invite some friends to visit an orphanage Christmas morning with a basket of trinkets from the dollar store.

Instead of taking up a seat at your church's Christmas Eve service, volunteer to greet people at the door, decorate, or serve up the snacks.

Changing your focus changes your life.  In fact, it's life inducing, because these are the things life is made of.

Merry Christmas!

9 days left. . .

Are you a gift-buying procrastinator?  Are you trying to find the perfect gift for the neighbor you don't know all that well?  What about gift-giving etiquette for the workplace?  Have a co-worker that celebrates a different holiday?

Well, Mrs O came across a great resource for give giving and I thought I'd share it.  It's called Cool Mom Picks.  They list all sorts of ideas for all sorts of people and they break down their suggestions by price range.  From DIY homemade gift ideas to gifts that give back by supporting African women or literacy initiatives, there are tons of great ideas.   

Let this be your springboard!

If the above link doesn't work for whatever reason, here's the URL you can paste into the address bar of your web browser:

http://www.coolmompicks.com/holidaygiftguide/

Also, for the gent who has trouble finding the perfect gift for his lady, don't forget to take advantage of things like pinterest and facebook.  If she likes it on facebook and pinterest, she might like it under the tree as well!

Merry Christmas!

'Tis the season. . .

My grandfather once told me, "You can tell a lot about a person by what makes them excited."

Men,

If you haven't already, this is the time to be thinking about a Christmas gift for your wife or girlfriend.  I find that lots of guys talk like they never get the right stuff.  Sometimes, they even feel like they've got a little making up do to next time.  I think that's because we, too often, go for the standards.  Mrs O is not identical to any other woman, so some standards just don't work for her.  They don't communicate that I love her.  It's not about the way I communicate, but the way she communicates.

When your girl is excited, what is she excited about?

Mrs O gets excited about quality time.  I discovered a long time ago that taking a surprise day off and making a simple itinerary of fun things to do together was one of the best ways to show Mrs O that I love her and that I know her.  I never would have put that together on my own, but I asked her about it.  I asked her what gifts meant the most to her.  Those are enlightening conversations.

Ladies,

If you find that your man is awkward when it comes to buying gifts, make sure you are vocal about your favorite ones, even if it's not exactly perfect.  Think about the little things he does--or used to do--and tell him how much you appreciated those things.  I remember one day when Mrs O told me that she really appreciated when I send her cards in the mail.  Her admiration meant so much to me.  It made me want to keep doing it!

Dreaming of a white...Black Friday!

Little E. staring at the winter wonderland!

The day after Thanksgiving we all woke up to a thin crust of sleet covering...well, just about everything.  Less than impressive.  Unless you're little E. that is.  Shortly after waking up we heard shouts of joy coming from the living room, "It's Christmas...everybody look: snow!  It's Christmas!" 

We spent our Black Friday in our jammies, put up our Christmas Tree, made some sugar cookies, paper chains and read news stories of all the Black Friday injuries.

Hope you had a SAFE and happy Black Friday!

The last lonely cluster of scallions left in our garden.

Comic of the week...the boat